Mommy @[email protected]

Seriously though, if anyone ever finds themselves being targeted by the FBI, don't just take your lumps. Flee to the Russian Embassy and make a gigantic spectacle about how you're being persecuted as a dissident and make it so that Russia can concern troll over America the same way they used to attack the Soviet Union in the international press. Not only may you succeed, it absolutely devastates the assholes in the State Department.