If you are facing a matter that involves something life-changing and truly important, where you don’t really have a choice…then don’t ever give up, even when something may look unwinnable. I think that’s probably the most important advice I could ever give a young guy. Obviously accept that you may not walk away with the desired outcome- and have an alternative plan- but giving up isn’t going to change that. You need to know what it feels like to hang in there down to the last. At the bare minimum, knowing that you tried 110% is something that will keep you from agonizing later on about whether or not you did your “best.” Creativity is one of the most under-rated personality traits in men…and it has gotten me out of some really dark shit in times past. It’s an almost supernatural thing to behold when you are able to change the rules of the game to your benefit. Find another angle of attack vs. whatever you are facing and use an asymmetric strategy. What I’m basically saying is that ”smarter, not harder” is pure magic when you can engineer your own way out/through.

An equally important skill is to know when something simply isn’t worth the sacrifice of time, energy and struggle- but it requires you to be objective and honest with yourself. Honesty with yourself is the basis for your honesty with all other people…and that guy looking back at you in the mirror is one of the most difficult people to be honest with. To be honest with yourself, simply perceive what “is“ -don’t dress it up with elaborate rationale or turn your brain in knots. Can’t overthink things. What do you see? That’s what it is.