Abraxas @[email protected]

Pinnochio: Oh look Jimminy, I got a DM

DM: You will never be a real boy. You have no brain, no heart. You are a puppet made out of wood by a senile and grieving toy maker. Jimminy Cricket laughs behind your back and any support is halfhearted and out of pity

FML

Just said to a girl that if she can't answer my riddle she has to have sex with me and she called the police.

@matrix

Government: We are passing the Free pizza for all act!

Citizen: Oh boy free pizza!

Government: Free pizza? All this act does is make it illegal to have pets

@11112011

The west needs Russian oil and gas but to make NATO feel like they are still in control of the situation they are asking Russia to pay for the privilege of selling it to them.

But Russia is just adding that onto the price of their oil and gas so its just making things worse.

@matrix

He would have been happier just being an incel that settling as a cuckold just so he could show off a female at family events to convince his parents he isn't gay.

@shitpisscum @Terry

Good to see you again.

Its definitely been difficult to find my frens again.

Paypig.org was getting to much child porn being shared through it and the server owner couldn't find any jannys to manage it

@Terry

Keep going please.

I've almost cum

@RikaDerufu

Is rent-a-girlfriend really about a guy addicted to renting escorts?

Its amazing for sanitised the humour of young Gen Z is. All they talk about is being gay and trans.

No sexism, racism or rape/murder jokes allowed.