I found an old unopened can of fourloko in my basement and my intrusive thoughts are telling me to chug it. If I give in, I will be too powerful and I will end civilization as we know it. I think the government should dissuade me. They need to start paying taxes to me. They should be buying me steam games and light novels and Lego sets every day to keep me busy. They need to be offering me Bionicles molded out of gold. They should be sending senators to my house to beg me not to pull the pop tab and unleash Third Impact.