@BHG

Other ideas:
* a literal lump of rock: claim it contains spiritual calming energy. bonus chad points if you can get away with an actual lump of coal.

* gym clothes that are way too big. sends the same message as small sizes but even funnier. combine with small underwear for max fuck you

* novelty mug in the shape of a toilet, or a coffin

* gummy sweets in the shape of dicks, guns, coffins, or turds.