I realized that when things go too well for me and I'm too happy for too long that I self sabotage in order to bring my life back down to a comfortable level of ... meh.
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@Tfmonkey "Meh" feels like home.
When things go too well you're on the lookout for some "Karma" like mishap to take place.
I have this weird behavior such that if I watch a feel good piece of media or with a really happy ending Disney style, I have the urge to offset the happy with Horror or a heavy/grudgy song like the whole discography of Godflesh and stuff.
A different manifestation of something I thought I was the only doing.
@Wopu @Tfmonkey
probably a good strategy.
Seems like balance isn't an ideal that we talk about enough. It applies to everything.
I had a period of being on top of the world at the beginning of adulthood. distorted my expectations afterwards.
Years later, I try to not take things for granted and just try to appreciate that I get to be a part of them.
Still have lots of goals and things I'm working towards. Just don't expect to ever "make it". Just to always keep improving.