@VooDooMedic Yeah, but don't those male baboons who rip their rival's stomachs open get to mate with their opponent's female baboons? You can ooo ooo ahh ahh when you checkmate your opponent in chess, but you're supposed to find some broad and checkmate her before you hate her and actually reproduce. Instead you're checkmating another chess dork, and it's the only mating you do. Now Mr. Chess Grandmaster checkmated himself too. If it makes you happy, though, that's really all that matters. The greatest 9d Chess Grandmasters, though, never even played chess and lie to a bunch of rubes and nerds about never losing in chess. Those winners aren't baboons, though, they're Orangutan. They live in the really high trees and basically just eat a lot of stuff. They're not really that violent, but then they come down the tree escalator and act like they're doing WWE promos which makes the baboons call the Orangutan God Emperor.