I realized that when things go too well for me and I'm too happy for too long that I self sabotage in order to bring my life back down to a comfortable level of ... meh.
@Tfmonkey "Meh" feels like home.
When things go too well you're on the lookout for some "Karma" like mishap to take place.
I have this weird behavior such that if I watch a feel good piece of media or with a really happy ending Disney style, I have the urge to offset the happy with Horror or a heavy/grudgy song like the whole discography of Godflesh and stuff.
A different manifestation of something I thought I was the only doing.
